Writing dialogue:Top 5 tips to write dialogue.
Writing dialogue:Top 5 tips to write dialogue. Writing dialogue is one of the most important fundamental aspects in creative writing. This is where your characters come to life and their personalities shine through. These are the magic ingredients which makes the reader fall in love with them or hate them to their core. Dialogue can be tricky as it needs to sound realistic but you can’t add the general day to day conversation. These five tips will you help you to write better dialogue and bring those characters to life.
1. Listen to conversations and write them down.
When I was doing a self-editing course, the editor suggested we should listen to conversations. As writers, we are observant and this can be a major pro. Observe a conversation, it can be with your co-workers, at school or wherever. Listen to a conversation in a café, and jolt everything down. Notice how people change the subject in a matter minutes, this should reflect in your writing too.
2. Keep dialogue tags simple.
Don’t use fancy dialogue tags. I know, the word “said” can sound boring. We writers want to be creative. When I started critiquing manuscripts, I noticed how distracting it is to use different dialogue tags. Don’t know what I mean? Here is example.
“Hi Sam,” Jean said.
“Hello Jean” Sam replied.
“Haven’t you heard!’ Jean exclaimed.
“What?’ Sam asked.
“Bob was hit by car!” Jean declared.
‘Oh, that’s terrible when?’ Sam cried.
Doesn’t that pull you away from the story? Keep it simple and stick with “said” or “asked” as those are the “invisible” tags. That kind of dialogue screams amateur. It is not a crime to add, “Shouted,” “yelled,” or “hissed” to make a point but not a continuous bombardment like the above example. Also, remember, your readers are smart and will be able to distinguish who is talking. So no need to add “said” after that speaking character all the time.
Tip: if you are going to use yelled stick with just yelled don’t write “yelled loudly” we know that yelling is loud don’t add unnecessary words your editor will thank you.
Another tip in writing dialogue:Top 5 tips to write dialogue.
3. Use body language to bring out the emotions and to avoid using too much dialogue tags.
Instead of using dialogue tags, you can describe your character’s body language. By doing so, you are showing what your characters are feeling. Like the below example:
Richard’s hand clutched round the glass. I feared it would smash on his hands. He stood and followed me in the kitchen. ‘Well, ain’t that relief, let’s open a bottle of champagne and celebrate, shall we?’ slamming the glass on the table, ‘how could you do something like this!’
He kept watching me with a hard look upon his face. ‘Well? What do you have to say for yourself?’
I turned crossing my hands against my chest, ‘… I just…’
‘What?’ He shouted.
I turned my back to him and poured red wine on the glass. Richard stomped towards me ‘what!’
By the slamming of glass and the stomping of the foot, we know that Richard is angry at his wife. Hardly any dialogue tags needed.
4. Don’t include everything and Keep dialogue realistic.
Think of how you would talk to people but as I said, you can’t include everything. If your character went to the supermarket to by milk, you don’t have to include the conversation between him and the cashier. That will bore the reader. But if your character went the supermarket to buy milk and there is a burglary than yes, include the dialogue as that would spark interest. Dialogue needs to reveal something about your character but don’t do this:
“Hello Jenny, my dear friend of ten years who has black hair, blue eyes and high cheekbones!’
Do you get my point? Do you talk to your friend like this?
And make sure you read it aloud.
Another tip Writing dialogue:Top 5 tips to write dialogue.
5. Watch movies/TV shows to enhance your dialogue.
Movies are all about dialogue . Movies are fun way to see how it’s done and help you improve. I’ll will do a post about movies with great dialogue to help you get creative on the next post so, stay tuned.
Bonus tip: I recommend reading this book to learn about dialogue. How to Write Dazzling Dialogue : The Fastest Way to Improve Any Manuscript
Thriller movies to watch to help you with your writing.
For those who don’t know, I am a thriller, mystery writer and I’m attempting to write and edit my debut novel. Meanwhile, I am saving up for an editor. Editors are expensive but necessary; anyway, I will talk about editors in the near future. By no means I’m claiming to be an expert, I’m not but I’m sharing my journey of what I learned through my experience as writer. I have been writing for myself since I was 16 (now I’m in my 30s) and have about seven unpublished manuscripts. I learned a thing or two but I’m still learning and growing to become better.
This post is about thriller movies (worth your while ) to watch. Especially if you are, like me an inspiring thriller/ mystery writer. Movies might not be books but they can be effective to your creative progress. I get inspired through music, books, and movies along other things. Movies have a script and they deliver that infamous trick in writing: to show and not tell. You can appreciate how well crafted the scenes are through movies, these can be implemented in your writing, and of course in the most important part of writing, the dialogue. Here are my top five favourites.
First movie in my list is one of my personal favourites. The opening shot is a masterpiece , but the again how could it not be when directed by the master of suspense himself Alfred Hitchcock. If you are looking on how to create the art of suspense in your novel, this comes highly recommend.
Every wondered what life would be without Facebook? We mostly probably would be scoping at our neighbours with… binoculars. See where I’m going with this? To take a glimpse of their life.
Our hero suddenly finds himself is in wheel chair and so he is rather helpless and bored ,to kill boredom he starts to peep on his neighbours, and then he sees something fishy and at the same time terrifying , one of his neighbours might have committed murder.
Maybe it doesn’t classify as a thriller but the opening scene of this movie is a must watch also for suspense. This movie has two particular scenes that cause a lot of tension.
The opening where we have the farmer and the Nazi Hans Landa (nicknamed as the Jew hunter). It’s clever how Tarantino developed this scene as the farmer and Landa are having a discussion but Tarantino gives us a shot of what is under his floorboards. The farmer,is hiding a Jewish family. This raises the question, does Landa suspects already? Doesn’t he? Of course, the farmer confesses the truth and Landa orders to have the family killed but the girl runs away.
The second time Tarantino does the same thing later on in the movie. Years later, the girl Shosanna Dreyfus, who had her family killed beside her in the above scene , is introduced to Landa and the tension starts to build again does he know? Did recognise her? Doesn’t he?
To the sexy side of things , but despite the eroticism in this movie we can’t deny that this an entertaining thriller with one of the sexiest female villains (Sharon stone), a seductive bestselling novelist who had her boyfriend killed the same way as described in her book. I still don’t get how writing a book gives you an alibi I thought it was supposed to mean that have to be in another place when a crime have occurred. Anyway, this movie can give you a good idea of how to build sexual tension and the cat and mouse chase.
Another film tin the list of thriller movies to watch to help you with your writing.This film story line is so good that I thought it was based on book. It wasn’t. If you are, aspiring to write a story with a private detective in it and in need of some motivation for a good plot to create a stunning twists. I won’t say much about it, you have to see for yourself 😉
Last one this list of Thriller movies to watch to help you with your writing.This is also my favourite thriller, I never get tired of watching it after all those years. You’re thinking of writing a thriller or crime novel with a serial killer? This is for you, seven people, not one of them connected, seven murders, all based on the seven deadly sins. Every scene in this movie is moody and dark that reflects the overall theme of the story. I love how they never mention the town and of course what’s in the box?
On a letter note you can also check out;
Have a movie in mind let me know down the comments below.
Five ways to improve your English: If English is your second language.
Five ways to improve your English English is complicated and hard language but the good news it’s not the most difficult to learn. These five simple tricks will help you improve your English and you can speak or write more confidently.
First tip on five ways to improve your English, if English is your second language. Nowadays with the internet, you can search for anything and everything is at your fingertips. Just go to You Tube and listen to the many English teachers teaching grammar and word pronunciation .Best of all it’s FREE.
I’m not telling you to study it from front to back but if you come across a word you never heard of look it up in your dictionary, or even better search on google there are plenty of online dictionaries. Also, today there are mobile apps that can help with a touch a button.
Don’t worry, I’m not telling you to become the next…..George R.R Martin and write a 1000 page novel. Writing and storytelling definitely improve your English because writing, among many sacrifices, involves lots and lots of thought. It doesn’t take rocket science to figure out that it requires even more coffee and patience when putting words on paper in a foreign language. The more you write, the better your English will become. If you don’t know the word in English you can always translate (it not always accurate). Trust me you will get better. So experiment and write a short story.
Watching movies in English can improve your English. Apart from entertaining yourself whilst listening you can also add subtitles. The more TV you watch in English the better you will get at it.
Read, Read and Read and do more reading/ listen to audio books too.
Last tip on five ways to improve your English. I see many posts in Facebook groups of people asking how to improve their English if they want to write or just speak it. I always recommend this: read, read and read and did I mention read? Read novels, fiction, non-fiction, magazines, newspapers, even the back of the cereal box.
Found a new word? Write it down, search its meaning. Also listen to audio books. Remember by reading you are learning at the same time. Through Movies and TV Shows, you are also listening how to words are begin pronounced and expressed. Apart from the flow and pace of the words.
So those were my tips to improve your English if English is your second language. Hope this will help you in the meantime. Happy reading and writing xxx.
Check out my other blogs Five-thrillers-to-read-this-summer/
Five Thrillers to Read this summer (if you’re having hard time picking)
Here is a list of my five thrillers to read this summer. that you can read while on holiday, relaxing by the beach, or with a glass of wine.
The first on this list of five thrillers to read this summer. This book is chilling, it’s about Grace and Jack the envy of all couples, or so it seems. He has the looks (if you like the George Clooney feel in a man.) and wealth. She’s beautiful and elegant. They are never seen apart, it seems like true love. But why does she never meets her friends for coffee, although she doesn’t work? Why does she never answers her phone? How does she cooks those elaborate meals and still remains so slim. But more puzzling, why are there behind bars on the windows?
Finished this books recently and it’s brilliant. Jenna had a heart transplant and she wants to know about her donor, a girl called, Callie. Jenna begins to feel what her donor felt before she died. Creepy right? She meets Callie’s still grieving family. Jenna looked like she had the perfect life and the perfect daughter. As Jenna begins to investigate what could have happened to Callie, the more unsettling the truth will become.
Another great thriller to read this summer The story begins with Ann and Marco a normal, rich couple. With a six-month-old girl, Cora. They are invited to a dinner party hosted by their next-door neighbour Cynthia. One thing though, they left their daughter asleep alone in the house, while they take turns to watch over her every half an hour. By 1:00pm, Ann, who has had too much drink, is tired, and feeling depressed, urges her husband to go home. When they go back to their house, they find the front door open and their beloved daughter gone.
Lydia Harris knows her marriage to Dean has problems, but when she finds a box full of news clippings, coupled with the great pains he took to conceal, the problems go from disappointing to dangerous. Nation-wide murders… in cities where he has travelled. She doesn’t want to believe him capable of such violence, so she searches for clues to explain the hidden clippings.
This had to the best thrillers to read this summer, if not this year. I can’t say much because everything can be a spoiler. It’s famous for its ending and I assure you its mind blowing. I can’t presume that you will like it but to me it was simply brilliant. Louise is a single mother who meets a man in a bar and kisses him even though she knows he’s married. When Louise arrives at work on Monday, she meets her new boss, David, the man from the bar. His wife is Adele, a beautiful woman who’s new to town. Louise and Adele become friends. Louise has an affair with David. Adele seems terrified of her husband. You’re in for a surprise for this one.
Happy reading xx
Five ways to add reading into a busy schedule: Few tips to find reading time.
We’re all way too busy with fussy schedules that stop us to do things that we love doing. We drop our hobbies in the back burner to do adult things. I have a full-time job, a part time job, and I write. As a writer, I need to read to get better and become inspired, without reading, I won’t write. Here are five ways to add reading into a busy schedule.
Set a reading Goal:
Goodreads have an excellent reading challenge where you can set the goal you want to read throughout the year. It can be 20, 50, or a 100 books it’s up to you. Don’t overdo it, it’s better to aim small. You can always go back and increase the challenge as you go along. I find this useful as last year, I’ve read about 60 books. This year, I set the goal for 75. I am already at 45 with 8 books ahead of the reading schedule.
Try to put some time aside dedicated only to reading.
A method to add reading into a busy schedule is to put some time aside for reading. It doesn’t have to be two hours, even half an hour will do. Just switch off your phone or put it on silent, fill a glass of wine, or coffee, and pick up that book . Find a comfortable position, a bed or sofa and start reading.
Pick a format you enjoy
Another way to add reading into a busy schedule is by picking a format you enjoy. In this day and age, we have so many book formats to choose from. Such as PDF, Kindle, paperback, hardbacks, and audio. I always say the book will remain THE book. Nothing beats the feeling of the paper in your fingertips, the smell, but I’m book lover. I always prefer the physical thing it’s more sentimental. I read kindles too it’s not the same at all, but hey, see what works for you.
Buy cheaper books.
Let’s face it books can be expensive bookworms splash a lot of money on books without a blink of an eye, but everyone loves a bargain right? Bookdepository offers discounted books and it’s free shipping worldwide say what? Yes, it’s free shipping. There also is Awesomebooks where you can purchases second hand books. Amazon is another holy grail for books. For digital ones you can sign up to sites such as Freado Bookbub Bookrebel Instafreebie and more. Those sites will have kindles as low as $0.99 even free, yes FREE! And of course you can head to your local charity shop or borrow books in the library.
Listen to Audio books
Another way to add reading into a busy schedule are audio books. Audiobooks are a good way to read more, well technically listen. The experience is different as you can’t see the words, or where the commas are placed but I find them so effective. You can listen while you’re driving, doing the house cores, exercise, or while you’re cooking. I managed to reach my yearly goal with them. You can sign up with audible for free for the first a month. Personally, I go to Youtube it’s filled with audiobooks and it’s always free.
Happy reading xx
Top 5 Must Read thrillers.
Since I am an inspiring crime/thriller writer this is the genre I read the most. Don’t get me wrong, I read other genres but nothing beats a good suspenseful story where it keeps you guessing what’s going to happen next, who is the killer? Thrillers are page tuners. So here are my top 5 must read thrillers that I recommend to read if you are getting started in this genre or looking for your next read, either for on the beach or to relax with a glass of wine.
Killing me Softly by Nicci French
This is one of my favourite books. I read this when I was 16 (long time ago) and a little too young to read a story with such themes of sex and violence. I keep going to it again and again, it inspired me to write thrillers in the first place. I describe this book with the three S’s; scary, suspenseful, and sexy. This heart-pounding thriller starts with one of the greatest opening lines I ever encountered
“He knew he was going to die”
Isn’t that a hook or what? It makes you wonder who’s going to die? Tell me! That’s the prologue, than the story jumps to Alice. She has seems to have everything; a comfortable, safe life, the loving, caring boyfriend, close friends, and a job as a research scientist. One morning, she locks eyes with a man so beautiful, he takes her breath away (it has romance in it.) She goes to work and forgets about him, until she goes out for her lunch break, and finds him standing on the pavement, waiting for her. Creepy right? She goes and has sex with him without knowing his name 0.o you might say hold on a second, how I’m going to relate this? You don’t have to. Driven by wild passion for Adam a mountaineer who was involved in a climbing disaster, she leaves everything behind and marries him without knowing anything about him. Stupid move but anyway.
That’s when things start to get spooky. Mysterious notes, phone calls, women knocking on her door claiming that she taken Adam away from them, so Alice goes to dig into his past and discovers disturbing secrets. The climbing disaster might have not been accidental at all. If you love steamy sex mixed with suspense this book is for you.
P.s The movie version of this book is horrendous does no justice to the book. Terrible.
The Collector by John Fowles
This book was a debut novel by John Fowles. One of his famous novels is “The French Lieutenant’s Woman.” This is considered a classic among classics. I know some people roll their eyes when they hear those words but hear me out for a second. This book is mind blowing, chilling and creepy as AF.
We have Fredrick an uneducated, unloved, and a collector of butterflies. A beautiful, intelligent art student Miranda infuriates him. When he wins a large sum of money in the football pools, he quits his job, buys a remote house, and kidnaps her with a false hope that she will fall madly in love with him. The story is told through the captor’s point view and the victim’s point of view, that’s what makes it so brilliant.
I recently watched a TV investigation show (research purposes) about two young men who kidnapped women, locked them in the cellar, raped and tortured and finally killed them. Cutting a long story short, when the police went to search the premises, in the cellar they found a copy of this book. As the investigation carried on the police found dozen bodies buried by the area of the house. One killer found the other was never caught. Scary Stuff.
Silence of the Lambs by Thomas Harris
A must read thriller, the second of the series. “Red Dragon” was the first, this book tells a story of a Buffalo Bill a scary fucko who kidnaps and kills curvy women for their skin. In silence of the Lambs we find Clarice, a trainee detective who is assigned to interview the brilliant but dangerous and now one of the most iconic villains Hannibal Lector, in an asylum. He is the one that can help in the case.
What makes this character so dangerous was that he was a forensic psychiatrist and cannibalistic serial killer. Which makes everything much worse. Is it just me that found him charming? Read the book, no need to read the first one you’ll be fine.
Ps. The movie is also fantastic.
Misery by Stephen King.
More into the horror side of things but it’s also a thriller. Misery is about a famous historical romance author Paul. He is involved in car crash and saved by Annie Wilkes, his biggest fan. She is not just your average avid reader. She is his nurse, tending his shattered body, and his captor keeping him prisoner in her isolated home.
When she finds out that, he killed off her favourite character Misery Chastain (he wanted to be known for books that are more serious.) Annie goes into angry fit. She burns the only copy he had of his unpublished manuscript and then forces him to bring Misery back to life by writing another novel she wants. This woman is just terrifying, definitely one of Stephen King’s best novels in my opinion.
And There Were None By Agatha Christie
Last and not least is the queen of mystery who got her ideas for her books whilst washing the dishes. This is one of her most famous books, having sold 100 million copies, and is considered her masterpiece and it is. The story is so original a must read thriller.
We have 10 strangers summoned to a beautiful house in a private island in Devon by an erratic millionaire that never shows up. In their rooms, they all have a poem “Ten Little Indians” on the dinner table there are ten figurines. Those same ten people are accused of committing crimes in the past. One by one, they start to die according to the way the soldiers/Indians die in the poem. Every time someone dies; a figurine is removed from the dinner table until there were none.
I love the simplicity in her writing no big fancy words, no 500-page novel with lots of back-story to cause confusion. It’s simple and to the point.
Happy reading and writing xx
Top 5 overrated books worth reading
These books are mentioned all the time because well, they are classics and brilliant. So here we go:
1. 1984 George Orwell
Oh, this book is scary, so scary, but somehow, I found it romantic in a weird way. Am I being naive? Each book affects people in a different way. It’s not a romantic book; it’s not a love story, but the fact that these two people were meeting up in secret under such circumstances was breathtaking. Some book are overrated for a reason because they are good. You can check the review over this end http://joannewritesbooks.com/blog/1984-book-review/
2. Catcher in the Rye J.D Salinger.
Listed in every list as the most overrated, boring, annoying book ever written. I didn’t read this masterpiece in my teens, but now, that I am in my thirties. This book spoke to me in ways that no story ever did. When you’re older you see things in a different point of view. If you read it clearly, you see that Holden is talking about today’s society, rather than the one of the 50s. It’s ahead of its time. A beautiful, touching story oneone of my all time favorite books.
3. Harry Potter series by J.K Rowling
The much beloved overrated books. No need for a summary for this one. Great world building, and wonderful imagination from the author, beautiful story altogether.
4. Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
This book is so terrifying and has left such an impact on me, that till this day (read it three years ago) I sometimes stop what I’m doing and think about it. It’s shocking, I just can’t even grasp why all that careful planning and dedication to frame your husband, when you can easily divorce him. However it’s the ending that made it this overrated book even more disturbing and creepy. Read the review here: http://joannewritesbooks.com/blog/gone-girl-gillia…lynn-book-review/
5. Thirteen Reason Why by Jay Asher.
I think this book became overrated after the popular TV show and its controversy. I hadn’t heard about its existence before, either that or I had been hiding under a rock all this time. This book is not for the faint of heart despite being for young adults, a genre I don’t normally read, I read it out of curiosity to see what the big deal was all about. I don’t recommend it to read it when you’re having a bad time in your life.
It’s about a girl Hannah Baker and she committed suicide, before she died, she recorded tapes stating the thirteen reasons why (as the title suggests) she was going to kill herself The tapes were sent to various people before arriving at Clay’s door.
It’s rather disturbing, I had to stop a few times and do something else before I could continue. It’s sad and heart breaking and one of the books that made me snob after I finished. A beautiful, sad book. Read Review over here http://joannewritesbooks.com/blog/thirteen-reasons…sher-book-review/
“You can’t go back to how things were. How you thought they were. All you really have is…now.”
― Jay Asher, Thirteen Reasons Why
So there it was the list of Top 5 overrated books worth reading, have a book in mind? Let me know xx
Top 5 most overrated books we keep hearing about
I’m settling for Top 5 most overrated books we keep hearing about. There are more than just five overrated literary works and these are the ones that came to my head. So, here we go:
Twilight series by Stephanie Mayer.
To be honest I haven’t read them and I’m not planning to at the moment. Maybe, when I run out of the books to read, which is unlikely to happen since my list is long varying from my personal collection, to authors who asked me to review their books. I have heard different opinions; some say they are badly written and don’t deserve the hype. Stephen King used strong words for her writing style and overall theme. If you haven’t seen it here is the link. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zb72V_4N5ko
I don’t think I’ll ever be prepared to read about a sparkly vampire, when there is Bram Stoker’s Dracula and Ann Rice’s works to consider.
The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.
I was doing a self-editing course when the editor suggested we read this book to appreciate great writing and prose. I always wanted to read this classic, named one of the greatest American Novels of all time. Finally, I was going to sit down and read it, I couldn’t wait I was so excited. It was a short one so I thought hey, I’ll finish it in three days, perhaps even less. Wrong, it took me nearly a month to finish and it was forced, it made me fall asleep. I read a page, and I dropped dead. The Great Bore more like it. Yes, the writing was beautiful but the character of Daisy was so blunt and stupid. This was the first sign that said I’m not a sucker for romantic tragic tales.
The Hunger Game series by Suzanne Collins.
This series is considered classics by now, if you mention the word dystopian Sci-Fi this trilogy is going to slap you in the face. Again, the opinions defer when it comes to this trilogy, some say they are bad some say they are good. I’ve read them and I enjoyed them, the writing is good too. The books are better than the movies but that is always the case. The ending made me weep like a baby, it was a perfect way to conclude the series but it was so sad.
A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgees.
Another dystopian classic alongside the masterpieces such as “1984” and “The Handmaid’s Tale.” We have Alex a fifteen-year-old leader of a gang who terrorise the utopian society of England in the future. I needed a dictionary just to keep up with all the slangs; Alex deserved everything he got. Yeah, he’s an antihero but I couldn’t identify with his journey and like the Great Gatsby, I don’t get the big deal behind this book. Some bits did made me laugh though.
Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James
Most overrated, hyped books of all time. I had to sit there and take it while this was happening. The author is equally overrated. I don’t get it, I never will, here I am trying to learn the craft of writing, reading the best works that made it to publication, and then ladies and gentlemen we have this monstrosity. As I said in the previous post, you can read it here
People who love this book look at me as if I dropped from another planet when they try to shove it down my throat. Maybe I’m insane or I’ve read too many books to know the difference between a good book, and a terrible one. No man, no matter how good looking, how rich he is, should ever be excused for that sort of behaviour.
Got an overrated book in mind? Tell me in the comments.
Happy Writing xxx
The writing life: Top 5 things you should never tell writer
Common question asked in every writer’s life about their writing life. Last week a friend asked me ‘what kind of job you would love to do?’
This for me was an easy answer but I was hesitant, few people know I write. I want to avoid answering the questions non-writers ask. Mostly they are stupid questions, so stupid and annoying that I’d be tempted to create a character based on them just for the satisfaction killing them off would bring. When I told my friend I would love to make money by writing books, then came the questions “what’s your book about?” “You are going to make a fortune” “so if your editor says yes, you will be able to publish it?”
If only it were that easy. I don’t think I’m alone here; we writers are asked a lot of questions and we’re not taken seriously. For most people, writing is not a real job and they assume that writing a book is so easy. The answer is writing a book is the hardest of crafts. It takes years to write, years to enhance your writing and let’s not forget the criticism. What’s my book about and how am going to summarise a 90k word thriller novel in just a few sentences. I need to get working on this but I want to stay in this cocoon of a comfort zone for a while longer. Meanwhile here are 5 top questions that you shouldn’t ask a writer:
“Oh you wrote a book? So, your book is the next Harry Potter or Fifty Shades of Grey or Twilight?”
Okay, you don’t know what my book is about why so you’re assuming it’s about BDSM, wizards or vampires? I don’t want to know. We’re in it for the passion we love to create stories. We’re artists in our own right and if you think you are going to write a book for the fame and fortune, you are going to be disappointed.
“Can you a write a book for me?”
No! I have my own ideas I want to write. No, I will not write a book based on your life story, here is a thought; why don’t sit your butt on the chair and write it yourself?
“Can you give me a free copy of your book?”
No, you cheap son of bitch I won’t! Pardon my French. Do you work for free? You realise I have to eat, right?
“Is your book any good?”
This question is so stupid on so many levels. Writers doubt themselves and they might be thinking no it’s rubbish. Any writer with half a brain is going to say yes because they want you to buy the book.
“Can I be in your book?”
Of Course you can… (Can you hear my sarcasm?) These people come in two different breeds; some want their name in the book (but imagine if they have a name that’s not so great.) The second breed want a whole character based on them “so my character, she has to be beautiful of course, you know a cross over between Jennifer Lopez and Selena Gomez. She has to be smart, successful, compassionate, caring, and wears designer brands.”
I think you have it covered you don’t need me.
‘I would write a book if I had the time.”
Not a question, but when I told people I write, I got this all the time. I sit down and do nothing all day. Writing a book takes a lot of discipline and time. It took you an hour to compose that email and you‘re saying you could write a book if you had the time?
Topical writing life
Happy writing xxx